If sheep were meant for heaven, call me a goat

I’m not calling for all out revolution. I’m not recommending Anarchy in the US. I’m just saying that having your own opinions and thought patterns wouldn’t be half bad. That the US has a higher voter to viewer ratio on American Idol than on Presidential elections should be a source of worry. Technology advances with leaps and bounds, but human intellect is stunted.

Why read when I can see the movie? That’s pretty much the general attitude of at least half the population, and you know that’s a kind statement. At best, people might have opinions they share on their blogs, but like many church goers, the love of all mankind and respect to one’s brethren ceases as soon as you exit the double doors, get in your car and are faced with the choice of accelerating or letting someone else pass first. That last bit means that people might be righteous online, but in the real world they are a lot tamer.

It’s quite an interesting contradiction: “I want everything for myself except my thoughts. For that I’ll just read my favorite news source, see where people are trending towards and I’ll mold my personality accordingly.”

Sounds like a stretch, but most people seem to behave in that way. Case in point, the worldwide adoration to Avatar. Don’t get me wrong, the movie is super well made, but best movie of all time? Come on. I don’t even consider it the best movie of 2009, much less the 2000’s and certainly not all time. But people still dress up in blue, tickle themselves in their tender places and insist on regurgitating what they were offered as fact instead of opinion. And don’t get me started on the people who learned the Na’vi and were suicidal because they couldn’t live on Pandora. WTF people.

It may be human nature to gravitate towards like minded people, but that isn’t the problem. The problem is that people are treating opinion like an organized religion. They accept all they’re offered without questioning a single point and when they see dissent, they cry witch and get their tar and feathers ready for a lynching. The worst thing about adopting someone else’s opinion is that you can’t change it directly. That’s why it should be your opinion. That’s why you should desist on being a sheep. You don’t have to wage all out war. You don’t need to be a terrorist threat. You just need a brain and the nerve to stand behind what you think.

Otherwise enjoy the grass and the company.

Blind Faith: Trusting what’s printed on nutrition labels

People count calories, they compare fat content, they raise an eyebrow at sodium percentages and many shudder at reading the phrase high fructose corn syrup. That’s a good thing because people are reading and comparing and trying to control what they put into their body. There’s only one problem, none of us really know if what we’re reading on a label is really what is in a can, a box, or a bag.

Every single day we put Blind Faith into effect and I don’t mean by putting the Blind Faith album from the 60’s into their stereo or MP3 player of choice. I mean that we trust that something doesn’t have fat, something really is low sodium and that the product we consume doesn’t contain something that could make us sick. It’s not that a cereal box has rat droppings, but who’s to say that a cereal contains what it says on the side of the box. Who guarantees that the salmon we’re eating really isn’t halibut.

Recently a group of students ran DNA* studies on cafeteria food and found that what they were being offered as beef was something else. I won’t get into specifics because the technology is still in development and there are questions to the validity of the results. That being said, what guarantee do we have that it isn’t right, and that instead of beef we’re not eating dog? Truth is we have no idea what we put into our bodies. Sure we read labels, but many are misleading and others go through the traditional routes of saying natural flavor, artificial flavors, but don’t really go into specifics. If you don’t believe me, just read a couple of nutritional labels and you’ll see what I’m talking about.

So next time you’re not feeling too good stomach wise, ask yourself a very simple question… what the hell have I been eating?

(*NOTE: if you want to see an article on what I’m talking about in regards to the DNA food testing, click the title of the post. Not the event I referred to, but scarier, especially if you love sushi.)

Authority was made to be questioned

When you think about the powers that be, public opinion and what’s considered to be normal, one could be quite tempted to simply not accept everything we’re offered as a truth, a given, a more or even a law. Some things are elemental and no brainers and don’t have to be questioned such as heinous crimes or attitudes of a dubious moral nature.

A paradigm by definition requires an overthrow to continue with evolution on pretty much every level, in any industry and in any quasi structure where the norm has been established. It happens with music, it happens with fashion, it happens with art, it happens with religion and it happens with politics.

What’s most interesting is that dissent and the power of breaking a paradigm begins with doubt, questioning, and the use of reason by people who are tuned to a different wavelength, a new zeitgeist if you will. From worshipping mother Earth, we switched to a panel of anthropomorphic deities that more often than not, showed character flaws we could relate to. Then Rome plagiarized the Greek system, changed the names and said it was a new religion. In other parts of the globe, Nordic mythology brought a rich mix of fiction and nature veneration, Zoroastrianism and Islam brought different spins to the Messiah story, Taoism brought a series of beliefs and pagan rituals to the masses, Buddhism ascribed godly attributes to the worldly, Hinduism professes its own series of mores and rules through a richly textured religion, Confucianism and Shintoism offer vastly different ways of seeing life in the same country and that’s without taking into account the beautiful religions from Native Americans, Amazon tribes, African tribes, Eskimos and all other aborigine tribes to explain what is this life we live. And this is just religion and just what we know without taking into consideration something as extensive as the Incan, Mayan and Egyptian religions. But trends have been found and they have changed. Catholicism is fighting tooth and nail to stay as the dominating super power religion while secular trends are trying to bring it down. If history serves as a frame of reference, what this means is that eventually something will replace it.

The same goes for economic systems. Feudalism, monarchies, fifes and capitalism are all wonderful isms for as long as they work to keep the participating parties happy. Politics have the eternal battle of the isms vs democracy. The progress of science is even based on dissenting voices questioning what has been established as knowledge. And as if that weren’t enough, a technological gestalt is pretty much impossible at the rate we’re delivering advances.

What does this hefty intro mean then? Well to quote Dylan: ‘The Times are a changin’. People don’t trust their governments, economic systems are collapsing, a desire to unify the world is in conflict with those who would rather facilitate segregation and knowledge in general has the daunting task of having to convince an ever growing society of cynics that what they’re living is not only normal but that they should be thankful for what they receive.

In this current economic state and even if you hate what you’re doing, it seems you have to be thankful for the cluster rape of work you offer at bargain prices while company magnates expect you to not notice that they have plenty of pie on their face, which they obviously don’t want to share. The debate over what is just and unjust is coming into play and people don’t like the results their observations are offering, and they want an explanation.

Why is it possible that healthcare can put a family on the street? Why do we have to give money to bail out an industry that is based on greed? How can we be expected to trust a government that thrives on backstabbing and scapegoating? Why are the powers that be surprised that we aren’t biting on the red herring? Why are they so scared?

Think, question authority, have an opinion. After all, it is your right... for now.

An obsession with inches: waist vs penis

In a material world such as ours, few measurements have more selling power than the inch. Miles per hour might sell cars through speed and gas efficiency, pounds might sell a variety of nutrition programs and is quite close on the scale to inches, but nothing can compete with the almighty inch. You see, only the inch can be responsible for billions of dollars in sales for fitness, weight loss, penis enlargement, bust reduction or augmentation, height, sexual paraphernalia, food and lord knows what else.

No other measurement is as malleable in its applications to sell. In fitness you can lose fifteen inches from your waist or increase two inches in your biceps. In weight loss, Body Mass Index (BMI) depends on the measurement of your body vs your height and build. In penis enlargement, well it’s self explanatory because rarely if ever will you see anyone want to trim anything from their pole vault. Breasts are another matter altogether because the search for the perfect bust can last several years thanks to the sheer materialistic excellence of plastic surgeons saying less is more and more is just wonderful. For height, heels are sold to varying degrees thanks in part to the size of their heel and size dictates needs, tastes, trends, and personality. Men don’t stray too far behind because often times they need that extra oomph to not look like an overachieving Oompa. In the phallic paraphernalia department it’s similar in concept to some of those mentioned above but the applications obviously differ somewhat since you can literally tailor make your own “best friend” no matter what weird ass pubic pet peeve you may have. As for food? Well Subs and Pizza depend on the almighty inch because remember, a foot long is always shown with a ruler showing twelve inches.

But the obsession over the almighty inch when it comes down to genre is just awe inspiring. If you’re not too keen to accept this hypothesis, then by all means tell me what you think about when I mention 36-24-36. If you’re thinking Power Ball numbers you have a problem. Most likely you’ll think of those fictitious Barbie measurements we’re sold as the ideal and what all women should strive for. If I happen to say 6 to 10 inches, what do you think about? Odds are that something meaty comes to mind, and I’m not talking value menu items.

The funny part is that in the obsession competition, I really don’t know who wins. I’m inclined to say men simply because male enhancement products sell so much, and because I’m pretty sure most men any of us know have measured themselves at least once in their lives, and yes that does include myself because I was a teen and my hormones did rage. But women in their pursuit for beauty do anything to trim their waist line, even if they look worse after losing the weight.

What’s best is that the base reason for the obsession is the same. Call it vanity, self pride, self worth, confidence or what have you; the quest for the perfect inch is something that crosses demographics, religions, boundaries, age, gender, etc. I’m not saying everyone in the whole world is obsessed with inches, but I will go out on a limb and say that most first world countries that don’t have the real problems severely impoverished societies do face have an obsession with what they’re packing around their midsection.

Pretty sad we don’t put the same focus and energy about two and a half feet northward huh? Excuse me, I meant 30 inches north of the mid section.

What the hell is artisan water

In a world where we can literally sell ANYTHING and get away with it, water has become the weapon of choice to reach new heights of idiocy. It wasn’t that long ago when I remember that I could drink water from a garden hose and only have to worry about maybe adding a rubbery hint to my flatulence. But nay, those days are long gone and we are left with a world that has to pay for something that pretty much makes ¾ of our body.

Oh and if you haven’t noticed, business is booming. From Dasani to Naya to Aquafina, Deer Spring, Evian and Fiji water, that little cocktail consisting of two parts hydrogen to one part oxygen sells like hotcakes and just like cars, apparel and neighborhoods, each brand caters to a specific person looking for basic hydration.

If you’re like me, you go to Costco, pick the cheapest brand that doesn’t taste like plasma from a Styrofoam monster and chug away, often refilling from your work’s ample and free water supply. But of course, this isn’t enough for some people and for these little wonders, we came up with artisan water.

In case you’re wondering, artisan water is not made by artists. It is also not the water used to clean brushes between color strokes while painting on a canvas. Just in case, it isn’t water used to make moving pieces of art either. In fact, there is actually no such thing as artisan water. What some people sell as artisan water is actually artesian water, which comes from ground wells dug up. Artisan water is just the trendy name given to the water type just to sell easier and pique intrigue in passersby from around the world.

Which brings me to one more point: just how much are we willing to pay for water in the long run? A bottle of Pellegrino can set you back almost $6 (US) in some places. Fiji water goes upwards of $2 (US) in most places. Dasani sells for $1-$2 depending on your venue and guess what, it’s treated tap water (I say treated because purified this ain’t, and in case you were wondering, Dasani is a made up word). The varying hydro markets shift and change with the greatest of ease and in the end, what do we get? Something that we used to be able to get from the faucet for little or no cost.

So next time your sipping on your premium water of choice, just remember that once upon a time, water, unlike you, was free.

Few things hurt more than listening to Sarah Palin speak

Politicians by nature are filled with crap. Sorry, that's just part of the job description as are empty promises, going against what you really believe to win votes and being an overall hypocrite, though luckily there are a few exceptions. That lovely intro being established, Sarah Palin is one of the few politicians who isn't afraid to be herself. The problem is that herself includes being idiotic, reading scripts worse than George W. Bush and basically tarnishing the image of women in politics, Alaskans, and republicans in general. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a Republican loving person in the political sense of the word, but I do think good competition leads to better results hence me wishing upon a star for better GOP representatives because if Democrats will be running the show for a while, I prefer sharp Republicans to force them to do a good job. Actually that's all I really want, you can worship the donkey or the elephant, I could care less, just do your job right.

Back to Palin though.

It seems that every time she decides to open her pie hole, something stupid comes out. From her position on offshore drilling where she pretty much blames environmentalists for the crisis, to calling reporters by made up nicknames. There's being personable and then there's being a jackass. That's you Sarah.

You aren't smart and the simple fact that you're female shouldn't give you a boost because Hillary Rodhman Clinton's great toe is more of a woman than you'll ever be, and she didn't get elected. You're just a dishy soccer mom who caters to religious nuts and conservative freaks that seem to have a short term memory, and forget that white north americans were the first immigrants... they just happened to have better weaponry and diseases.

As for your entire agenda... thanks for the entertainment but I seriously hope people don't take you seriously because if you happen to have a shot, I just might move out of the US. And I mean it this time.

Change of Focus

After some time with this blog I realize that writing on here isn't as easy as any of the other places I write. When I analyze this, the most important thing that comes to mind is that this is my optimistic blog, my happy blog and also the one I don't curse at. Seeing my difficulty with this, I've decided to say one simple thing:

Fuck that.

A blog exists to speak one's mind and mine just happens to be filthy and some other places I write I have complete freedom in content... so it's a bit frustrating to see that I've taken so long to even surpass 50 posts on this blog while I've written hundreds of random things on others. So if anyone is reading, which seems doubtful, rest assured the times are a changin and this blog is going to become quite a vent... so though I may not go with a smile with what I write, I will have the satisfaction of not having a crutch.

Cheers

What does faith feel like?

What an utterly fascinating question. It’s almost like trying to effectively describe love. Some people describe love as a warm and fuzzy feeling you might have inside, but think about it, what exactly is a warm fuzzy feeling on the inside? For warm you can think of a soup on a cold day or maybe a shot of brandy as a night cap, or how about a hot shower when you’re still groggy? For fuzzy you think of texture, something completely sensorial; which is funny because you can’t really grasp or touch love. Yes you can feel it, but you can’t touch it.

So when you ask what faith encompasses physiologically, you will get a variety of metaphorical answers that try to explain something that can’t truly be explained effectively. I recently did my Catholic Confirmation, and I think it’s funny that some people have the suspicion that I drank some magic Kool Aid and have suddenly gone all Christ loving. For some reason, saying I’m agnostic consistently gets people thinking I’m atheist. It’s like if I said I were bisexual everyone would think I was gay, because once you suck cock, well, it’s hard to make a case that you are not a one reproductive organ lover. But as with most things with me, it’s not that simple.

I have a Catholic upbringing so that’s my frame of reference to explain something that I don’t get, but I feel. Does that mean I deny my Buddhist, Hindu, or Muslim sisters and brothers? Certainly not. I find different religions deeply fascinating, as I do the one I’ve been brought up on. Does that mean I deny my Science loving brothers and sisters? Certainly not. That’s because none of us have any clue as to what’s really going on and why we’re here, but we all have the right to search for answers.

Science and religion have fought since their beginnings pointing a finger at each other and saying each one has the real explanation of why we’re all here, and that is simply bullshit. Being agnostic, I question most things and accept the possibility of most things as well. Do I believe there’s a man in the sky dressed in white robes who gives pieces of delicious tasting bread to people for behaving? No. Do I believe that there is no God and that we are merely products of ribonucleic recombinations, ever adapting to our current environment? No. Reality just isn’t that simple or clear cut, if you ask me.

If you break it all down, one explanation is rational while the other one is emotional. My problems with science stem from the fact that when you control conditions to produce a result, you’re nothing more than a glorified magician. You might have changed your cape and wizard’s hat for a lab coat and notebook, but you’re no different. You’ve just upgraded to fit the times and refined your magic work to convince people of your truths with complicated numbers, charts and calculations. If you wonder how I could say such a preposterous thing, it’s simple. If you accept the words anomaly, probability, and error, you accept that science is flawed. On the other hand, you have religion. Purely emotional and offering some explanations that don’t make a whole lot of sense. But if you simply look at them that way, obviously you won’t see any benefit in either.

Bill Maher is a cynic of the times and though he makes a lot of sense a lot of the time, he can be such a smug prick about his opinions that he doesn’t accept there’s some grey middle ground to be discussed as well. I love how he gets all pissy and preachy when someone has a differing opinion that irks him, because though he can accept arguments on certain topics, he’s quite incisive towards others, especially faith and religion. People have said that for ages religion has been the reason why we’ve had wars and conflicts for as long as we know. I say false.

Before your eyebrow hits the ceiling, hear me out. Religion by itself is harmless, as is science. They are trying to explain something we don’t understand. Some of the things might not make any sense, but we take the answers we’re given until a better one comes along. Just in case, religion hasn’t killed people. Religious people however, now that’s a whole other story. Religious institutions, which are governed by people who use religion for their own ulterior motives, now that’s where evil does reside. Because you take something harmless like a book, let’s call it the bible, and you misquote it to justify some pretty heinous actions and then have the balls to say that God told you to do it. Well let’s put it this way, if you change the character of God for Satan, then a person goes from being divinely enlightened to possessed, and from righteous to villainous, just because you changed one character. But in its essence, it’s still just a book trying to explain what the hell is going on. Is it factual? No. Is it historical? Slightly. Is it the truth? Well exactly WHAT is the truth? It’s just a book and religion is just a set of mores, rules and guidelines to try and get you through your day without stepping on other people’s toes.

Some people might say “But science and technology have come a long way in helping us understand the cosmos?” If that’s so, then why do we underuse our brains? If that’s so, then why do new theories oust old theories? If you want my perspective, it’s simple: data + results do not equal the truth. It equals a possible truth. And if religion was used as the scapegoat to start wars, science and technology developed the means to carry them out. It’s not like people were fighting each other with crosses and hard cover versions of the bible. So which one is worse?

Since I was 13 I’ve had a crisis of all faiths resulting from almost drowning and not seeing a tunnel of light, not feeling a hand pulling me from the depths towards safety. I’ve been thinking and pining over death since I was about 9 and had already lost four close relatives. But does that mean I won’t pray and speak to a higher power I know nothing about? Does that mean I’ll look at scientists and religious people and scoff at their explanations of why we’re here? Simply put, no. I’m not one to judge anyone on their preferred set of explanations. I just try to get something out of everything I come in contact with because it’s always easier to write something off, but it isn’t that easy to see a positive in something that may not make sense. So would I say I’m religious? Not necessarily. Would I say I’m scientific? Not necessarily. For me, a non logical combination of spiritual and rational aspects is more towards my liking… and no, I’m not going to become a Scientologist either.

As for religion, to me it offers examples and issues a set of guidelines. Regarding Catholicism and Christianity, I actually really like the figure of Jesus and his values. From what I’ve read and what you may grasp, he tried to help people, tried to talk sense to them, was the first feminist, accepted lepers, hookers, Moors and Samaritans. He decried institutions and criticized temples that divided and categorized people hierarchically. He invited people to look at themselves before criticizing others and he stuck to his values, even if it meant dying. Now you can speculate whether he was the son of god, a savior, or what have you, but at the very least, you can’t deny that what’s been written has him being a pretty cool cat. He said if you are slapped, offer the other cheek, which I interpret it as saying that it takes two to fight or that if someone loses their cool, it’s up to you to keep the cool (but that’s my interpretation). He was pissed at Pharisees and called them hypocrites because they were more concerned with money, influence and power rather than faith. He also said that whoever looked at their brother and cried fool would face the fires of hell. Now if you take the hell connotation out, it seems like he’s asking people to do something better than to criticize or judge others.

Now do I think all of this is factual and happened as is written? Well I’ll answer a question with a question: Why are there different versions of the bible, why are their scrolls we are not allowed to read and why do we need others to interpret the “word of god”. Why is there even an interpreter or a middle man? Hell, last time I checked, if you played the telephone game with eight people, the message that starts out rarely gets to the end without changing significantly. I think religion is much the same way. True, they try to maintain the tradition and what have you, but time passes, needs arise and greed edits to its own satisfaction, be it science or religion. Honestly speaking, I could just as well quote Star Wars, Fight Club, The Sandman, Dune, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Niebla and Lord of the Rings and some of their characters to show what aspects I resonate with and base my theory of life on.

But to answer the question, what does faith feel like? Well, I have no idea, but if I had to offer a description, it’s that split second when you jump off a ledge, after you took that step and before you begin to freefall where you don’t know what anything is going to feel like, but you have already accepted the direction your going and that in the end, the outcome won’t matter, because you’ll be ok with it if you look at it with an open mind. If you fall to your death, it’s a logical explanation; if you land on a lower ledge, it could be divine intervention or luck; and if you sprout wings and float away, it’s a miracle. The middle explanation is the only one that accepts personal interpretation and offers a choice, whereas the other two lean completely to rational or emotional. What they all have in common is that before the outcome, you took a step and said screw it, what will be will be and the peace in that moment, though brief it may be, is what we may know as faith. It is the happiness of a decision without taking into account the consequence; it is not caring about anything but the moment. It is freedom in its purest form.

Other people describe how faith feels more in tune to the definition of joy, enlightenment, celebration, security, etc. I’ve simply chosen to describe it as peace. Is this the right answer? Instead of replying with, “who knows?” or saying “maybe”, I ask another question: “why care?”

Draft your definition, edit as you see fit and be happy if you find an answer that makes even the slightest bit of sense for you.

Hope this perspective in some way helps anyone reading in their quest to find a definition.

Cheers

Random things that make you smile

In the spirit of doing lists, here's a list of things that make me smile:

Waking up and not feeling tired.

Having your bath or shower water be the perfect temperature.

Waking up refreshed and realizing you still have three hours to sleep.

Saturdays.

A message in your voice mail box that makes you laugh instead of just informing.

A real letter in your mailbox.

An email that isn't a forward.

Finding that song that has eluded you for months or even years.

Getting something free in a restaurant you go to all the time because they know you by name.

Having an old friend over for dinner.

Seeing someone in your local book/music/department store and hanging out for the entire afternoon or evening.

Being able to snuggle with your dog.

Having your nephew say your name for the first time.

Drinking or eating something you've been wanting for months.

Smelling something that reminds you of something from when you were eight.

Seeing someone from your youth who has matured and become a much better person.

Finding that candy that you used to eat when you were in sixth grade.

Opening a file only to find a prize you won when you were in junior high.

Finding a shoebox full of funny pictures.

Drinking the most delicious tea on a chilly day.

Putting on an album that makes you dance.

Cooking to Van Morrison.

Sharing a bottle of wine while listening to Miles Davis.

Calling someone by mistake and talking for hours.

Time makes you smile more than money

For the longest of time, people just wanted money, money and more money. You'd think they'd just want peace of mind, but the reality is that they just wanted different types of power be it acquisitive, social, influential, or any other thing that results from having mucho dinero. Slowly though, I see people who are more interested in quality time to enjoy with their families, to have to do their own thing or whatever. I'm not calling it a paradigm shift by any means, but I will call it the response to years of generating capital only to not be able to use it.

Think about it, some of the richest people you know (not all of them mind you), have an amazing house, a slick car, snazzy clothes and regularly work thirteen hour days. Then other rich people you may know have a broken home, are actually in debt and never get to enjoy anything because they aren't happy.

Then I see people who are making ends meet, make a decent salary but actually spend time with their loved ones or have a small art studio which they don't neglect or actually give themselves the opportunity to write the next great American novel. Those people actually seem to be better off than filthy rich people, though rest assured, some rich people are just fine in their lives because they are appreciative of their wealth and don't feel a need to compare themselves to anyone else.

Then you read polls in major magazines or just talk to people you know and though it's obvious that quite a few people could use more money, it's incredible how across the board the wish for more time is. And then you wonder if people could choose free time or a little extra money, which would they pick and something tells me that unlike the US dollar, time has not devalued and has actually sky rocketed in market value.

But you don't hear anyone ask for some spare time. You don't see anyone begging for a few minutes of anyone's time. That's because instead of being top of mind, it's actually burried deep beneath stratas of worry and stress.

So one day, just to find out how much you miss free time, might I recommend taking one of those 15 sick days you rarely use and simply do what you want to do... just a thought.

Cheers

Oldschool has never been more stupid

To celebrate the release of the hot Tub Time Machine, Wisconsin's Mauston community has just defluxcapacetered itself into 1955 regarding their involvement with teen sex education. If you haven't read, click the title of this post to see yahoo's coverage of a wonderful little article talking about how sex ed teachers can now face jail time and a $10K fine if they actually show kids how to use contraceptives and other forms of birth control.

Juneau County District Attorney Scott Southworth last month sent a letter to area school districts warning that health teachers who tell students how to put on a condom or take birth-control pills could face criminal charges.

In a move that can at best be called ignorant, Southworth along with his conservative mob insist that teaching sexual education including the proper use of contraceptives is one of the leading causes for teen pregnancy and delinquency, since people under the age of 17 having sex can be tried on a misdemeanor charge. I'm not a huge advocate for offering opinion and judging people merely on what they say, but when it comes to this topic, I think people should really take a break from keeping their head where the sun doesn't shine.

Luckily, there are people that along with sex educators, feel that this law does not hold water:

Janine Geske, a Marquette University law professor and former state Supreme Court justice, said she didn't understand Southworth's legal logic. She said that if he tried to prosecute a teacher for adhering to guidelines approved by the Legislature and governor, the case would likely be dismissed.

"To be frank, I can't follow exactly what he's trying to get at," Geske said. "If a teacher is educating a student pursuant to state law ... I don't see how under any examination (that) could be criminal."

Just in case, I don't understand the logic either, though that doesn't matter because I don't live there. But Audrey Jensen does, and she has an opinion I highly agree with.

"Audrey Jensen, whose 16-year-old daughter, Justina, is a sophomore at Mauston High School, said Southworth is trying to censor what students learn, usurping the role of parents. Children will have sex regardless, she said, and they need all the information they can get."

Censoring education has never been a pretty thing and being told what people can or can't read or learn has simply been something nations have had to cope with for centuries since governments obviously don't want us to know certain things that can but thoughts in our brains and restlessness in our souls. But this isn't some refusal to distribute classified and anarchy feeding knowledge. This is basic teachings every teen should receive so they at least have some information to juxtapose with real life situations when faced with someone that is also responding to crazy hormones and wants to know what happens when you put one and one together. Without the proper education, they might actually find themselves getting a poor definition on synergy and see that one plus one can equal three or more without the proper birth control.

But alas, some people need to champion ignorance:

Matt Sande, the legislative director of Pro-Life Wisconsin, which opposes the new law, said every district attorney in Wisconsin should follow Southworth's lead.

"We commend him for his courage, his frankness in exposing the consequences of this irresponsible new law," Sande said. "If I were a district administrator, I would want to know the impact."

If you're confused as to what law it refers to, it's a state law that mandates that any school choosing to teach sexual education (which isn't mandatory) is required to teach teens about birth control and practicing safe sex. Yes I know, in a beautiful, pristine and pink conservative reality, kids would marry their high school sweethearts, would make love only after they get married, would have 2.3 kids and would never cheat on their taxes. But this isn't lala land. Kids nowadays are even crazier than when I was a teen and teenage pregnancy continues to rise and ages for pregnant teens continue to lower.

Just the thought of a law against teenage sex is ludicrous enough for me because to prosecute teens you'd need one of three things to happen: that a teen who has been conditioned to feel shame for having sex confesses because of the guilt they have inside, that an officer knocks on some steamed windows and actually goes through the prosecution or that teens become pregnant, which could then be debated because what happens if two kids were just masturbating on top of each other and one of those crazy pregnancy stories came true?

The fact of the matter is that more likely than not, teens are going to continue having sex and conservatives will continue to preach in their underwear since most of them since enough to make any messiah weep in disgust. I'm not usually this brutal when it comes to judgment calls because I sincerely do think people are entitled to their opinions, but I do have a problem when people insist on shoving and imposing their opinion onto others. Think of it as me rebelling against Jehova's Witnesses for their house visits offering me the path to Christ. I don't mind that you're a Jehova's Witness. Seriously, whatever gets you through the day without imposing on someone else, then bring it. But waking me up at 8:00 a.m. on a Saturday or Sunday because you're on a door to door crusade is butting into my life and I do resent it... as I resent being told what I shouldn't learn, especially when sex ed teachers are doing their best to help kids, not throw them to the wolves.

If you still think that sex ed is all about breeding curiosity, might I invite you to sit into one of those classes. That's because I STILL remember all the pictures of herpes, gonorrhea, syphilis and genital warts that put me in the mindset of never having sex without a condom. Oh and I'm about to turn thirty and I've yet to get anyone pregnant... so maybe, just maybe, I benefited from sex ed... or maybe God doesn't want me to have children, whereas I'd owe an apology to Pro Lifers who insist that we should be fruitful and multiply even if we don't have the means to properly support a child.

But hey, that's just me babbling.

Resolutions 2010

A new year, a new chance to set goals to see if I can achieve whatever I can think of. Being the second year of resolutions, I can definitely say I’ve learned quite a few things about myself and the positive effects of tabulating what I do in a full year. First off, I’m inclined to accomplish things rather than let them marinate for another decade or so. Second of, I can actually see where the year has gone. I see movies I saw, games I played, books I read, trips I took etc. So what’s new for 2010? Well let’s see.

Category #1: PHYSICAL. Last year I had a decent rate going until I had a neck spasm and injured my neck. Then lack of mobility and laziness settled in and I finished up way under par with lots of what I wanted to do. So for this year, I’m simply going to repeat my ’09 goals and add onto them.


Bicep Curls
0 / 5,000

Butterfly curls
0 / 5,000

Pushups
0 / 5,000

Sit-ups
0 / 10,000

Jumping Jacks
0 / 10,000

Squats
0 / 10,000

Pullups
0 / 1,000

Tricep press
0 / 5,000

Workout 40 times with Wii Fit, Insanity or Active for the Wii
3/40

Miles run/walked
1 / 100
Last year was pathetic at best. I need to pick this up this year, no excuses allowed. Hell running or walking more than 3 miles is laughable at best.

Category #2: HEALTH. Some things that used to be in physical are being changed to health and various new goals are being added.

Meditation/Reflection/Goal setting hours/ Breathing exercises
0 /100
Last year I sucked at this. This year should be somewhat better or so I’m hoping. Here’s to a more focused 2010.

Eat less sugar
Spend two weeks in the year without eating candy or desserts
0/2

Spend two weeks in the year without drinking soda
0/2

Go to the dentist
0/2

Go to gastroenterologist
0/1

Go 4 times to the chiropractor with my fiancée
0/4

Go to general practitioner
0/2

Category #3: PROFESSIONAL

Professionally I think 2009 was a pretty good year though I was kind of tentative with a couple of things. Let’s bring it to the 2010 and beyond.

Freelance jobs
0/10

Work proposals
0/10

Category #4: ACTIVITIES

One of the good things about 2009 is that I kept pretty busy between work and all the things I wanted to accomplish. There were truly few or no boring moments of my year and I like to keep it that way. Plus, all work and no play makes me a dull boy.

Surf Sessions
6/50
Repeating the number of surfs from last year. It was great to almost make the final tally and pushed me to ride and find surf instead of stay home and widdle time away. My goal is 50, but I have all intentions of surpassing this number. Let’s see by how much I can do it.


Swim / bodysurf / water activities
0 / 10
Didn’t achieve this 2009 goal, let’s bring it into the new year and do it.

Local tourism
0/4
4 local trips with my fiancée

Movies
1 / 25
Gonna bump this down to 25 which is a full 15 movies less than last year. I need the money for the wedding.

Watch DVD’s I’ve bought
1 / 20
Watch even more of the stuff I’ve bought just to put it to good use. I’ve enjoyed watching what I’ve bought and don’t want to stop. As for a specific number, let’s put 20 to be able to quantify this goal.

1. Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me B-

Finish Videogames
0 / 15
Finish 15 games during the course of 2010. I have three games already started so that’s one hell of a head start. Let’s see if I can pull it off.

Finish Reading 20 Books
0 / 20
Finish reading 20 books
Also have some books I started reading and really want to pick up where I left off last year and get a lot of reading done.

Playing guitar
2 / 100
Keep playing like I’m playing or more so. Recording and learning songs will most probably come later. To be able to quantify it, let’s say I have to sit down to play guitar at least 100 times for at least 15 minutes or more.


Category #5: KNOWLEDGE
0 / 15
Continue learning every day, such is my mission but I’d like to also put down in writing stuff I’m learning. Let’s say 15 knowledge posts for the year to be able to document and track my progress.


Learn Random Info
0 / 100
Every single day I try to find new random information, now the trick is to find other sources that aren’t wikipedia. Lol. To put a number to this let’s say 100 new things to learn.

Read the news and post a blog entry
0 / 20
Did this last year and actually enjoyed not being disconnected from the world. Might actually start posting about stuff I read about on the blogs just to add incentive to the thing. Let’s say 20 news blog entries.


Category #6: WRITING

Definitely this is one of my passions and I want to pick it up in regards to some projects that were dangling last year.

WAS
1 / 150
I actually reduced the amount of blog posts for that blog for a very good reason, I have been feeling as if writing there isn’t what it used to be and people don’t care as much and not to sound like a wuss, but well, it gets to me because if what I write is boring, then why the hell write it in the first place? Still the single best thing to vent in my life though, so can’t drop it altogether.

Posts in other blogs
2 / 75

I’m going to insist on writing on these other blogs just for the sake of it all. This isn’t a priority, but would enjoy getting it done for the sense of accomplishment.

Finish book
Up to Chapter 41 so let’s say I’m 41/44 and I want to get to 44 before May.
40.5 / 44

Transcribe book
0 / 44

Write short stories
0 / 10
It was so satisfying to write that one short story that I need to repeat the experience at least ten times.

Essay project
0 / 20
I did NONE of these last year. Will 2010 be the essay breakout year? Who the hell knows?

Draft story arcs for Novels
0 / 3
Let’s pick this one off from last year and put it to good use. I jotted down tons of ideas for the novels but didn’t write down a proper story arc.

Draft Movie Script Idea
0/1
I still want to do this one and hopefully I’ll make time for this.

Progress reports
1/4
This is the first one so I’m off to 25% woohoo. Actually I saw last year that making a progress report every month was a super pain in the ass, so I’m going to be trying just 4 posts for every quarter this year and see if results vary.

Standup piece
0/1
I’d forgotten this one in the midst of it all and I insist on being able to take it up again. Let’s friggin do it.

The Mega Music review
0 / ?
Review each and every album I own. This is not a one year thing, but want to start this year with full blown reviews for all of my albums.

Category #7 Wedding stuff

You bet I’m going to include my wedding stuff here. I need to organize myself and what better way than to always have a list staring me in the face.

Confirmation
0/1

Get coordinator
1/1
100%
Meet and greet with coordinators and pick one.

Plan honeymoon
0/1
Look at destinations once again and also cost and start making arrangements.

Invitations
0/1

Flowers
0/1

Decorations
0/1

Dance Classes
0/1

Find an apartment to live
0/1

RANDOM ACTIVITIES

Buy a box of contractor bags and take one with me to the beach to pick up garbage.
0/1

Make a great Halloween costume duo concept.
0/1

Have our first house dinner with family.
0/1

Invite two couples over for dinner.
0/2

Have at least one jam session before the year is over.
0/1

Cook for my fiancée four times.
0/4

Take my car for maintenance twice in the year.
0/2

Clean up my MSN messenger list
1/1

Clean up my Facebook Friend List
0/1

Organize my room and throw away anything that isn’t necessary
0/1

Fix light bulb in garage
0/1

2009 Resolution Report Card

So a year has come and gone and resolutions galore were made at the beginning of last year, and I did pretty good in some, excellent in others and pathetic in a few as well. Here’s the tally and my explanation for the outcome in each section.

PHYSICAL

I was in good form leading into November when I got a marvelous next spasm that knocked me out of exercise contention from this set of resolutions. True, I insisted on not doing any more exercise in the form of free weights and such and truly have only myself to thank for not achieving this. These same goals will be adopted into 2010 with my eyes set on achieving each of them.


Bicep Curls
3,100 / 5,000
62%

Butterfly curls
3,100 / 5,000
62%

Pushups
3,100 / 5,000
62%

Sit-ups
6,600 / 10,000
66%

Jumping Jacks
8,200 / 10,000
82%

Squats
5,500 / 10,000
55%

Miles run/walked
3 / 100
3%

NOTE: This is one of the problem spots I want to address. Walking three miles in one year is ludicrous at best and truly explains my lack of cardio.


Yoga classes
Never found information on this and said goal will probably have to wait until 2011 when I’m more settled down and have my own time table to work with.


Meditation/Reflection/Goal setting hours
8 / 100
8%

Yet another pathetic result in one of my resolutions. You’d think it’d be easy to sit down and think and relax, but it’s not. Going to repeat this goal and see if I can’t at least get a slightly less pathetic tally.


PROFESSIONAL


Freelance jobs
10 of 10
100%
One of the highlights of my ’09 was achieving this goal. I was sure I wasn’t going to make it and poof, four jobs land on my lap in December. Thank you to the people who trusted in me to do work for them to give my best and achieve this goal. The bar shall be set the same but let’s hope I can get an even higher number. Unfortunately there’s not much I can do to super push for this goal to be achieved since I depend on demand to offer my supply.

Work proposals
N/A
I sincerely lost count of how many suggestions, large and small, I made at work. Quite a few were taken into consideration and it’s just my job to go even further with this and show I’m not just a good copywriter. Let’s hope this isn’t all just bull.

Work on portfolio
I was never hell-bent on achieving this goal and it shows. I feel no remorse for not having added one ad to the portfolio and I sincerely hope to never have to return to an agency. Freelance work is a hell of a lot more satisfying on way too many levels to begin to audit.


ACTIVITIES:


Surf Sessions
49 / 50
98%
I’m very proud of this outcome because at the end, I could have gotten the fifty surfs in, but I saved myself for the weekend instead of surfing crap for the mere sake of achieving a goal. Actually, I even surfed one day without swim fins because I left them at home, so how’s that for retarded but committed surfing?


Swim / bodysurf / water activities
4 / 10
40%
Going to pick this goal up for next year as well and looking forward to not being such a joke. Have to see how many water activities I can come up with to achieve the goal.


Local tourism
N/A
Didn’t do much or any of this and that blows because I should make a better effort to enjoy what my immediate surroundings have to offer and not depend on a plane to have an adventure.

Concerts
4 / 5
80%
0 for 5 until October and boom, 4 concerts popped in. Seeing Pearl Jam live two nights in a row and once in front row was almost too much to bear. I couldn’t stop smiling and just remembering that is motive enough to feel better and better about my ’09. Add to this seeing ACDC live and I really can’t complain of the year. Quality shall always trump quantity.


Trips
1.5 / 2
75%
Went to Philly for the first time and to be honest, I’d give the city one more shot but I don’t think I’m ever going to be enamored by the City of Brotherly love. Maybe I expected too much and expectations weren’t met, maybe it was the rain but honestly, Philly wasn’t as wonderful as I envisioned. The experiences and the company made the trip. The .5 is from a one day stint in NYC. To be succinct, I’m never doing that ever again and I have to take my future wife to New York for a few days so she can experience the city instead of the lame time we had.

Writing with Pen & Paper
Did a pretty good amount of this and I can’t say I’m not going to take this up more often. It is very satisfying not depending on electricity to get work done. You just need something to write and your brain.


Movies
25 / 40
62.5%

The end of the year fizzled for me seeing as I didn’t go to the movies that much in December, which is odd on way too many levels. Actually I haven’t seen a movie yet this year and to be honest, that’s also pretty weird. Below is a rundown of what I did see though.

Fantastic Mr. Fox / A

SAW VI / B

This is It / A -

Inglorious Basterds / A+

Ponyo / A -

The Goods / B+

Moon / grade A -

District 9 / Grade A -

Brüno / Grade B

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince / Grade A -

Transformers 2 – Rise of the Fallen / Grade C-

Public Enemies / Grade D +

The Hangover / A

The Proposal / A -

Land of the Lost / B -*

Up / A+

Paul Blart / C

Angels and Demons / C+

The Wrestler / A+

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button / A+

Coraline / A++

Slumdog Millionaire / A -

Watchmen/ B

X-Men Origins: Wolverine / B -

Star Trek / A



Watch DVD’s I’ve bought

There wasn’t a set number of movies I had to see, I just wanted to put my money to good use and not just be a completely compulsive buyer. I think I did ok, but hoping to do even better in the New Year. I might even put a fixed amount of DVDs or specific titles I want to see.

The Office Seasons 4 & 5

Read or Die / A-

MirrorMask / B+

Labyrinth / A

Tori Amos A Midwinter Graces Bonus DVD / B

Radiohead Hail to the Thief Bonus DVD / A-

Radiohead Amnesiac Bonus DVD / A

Radiohead Kid A Bonus DVD / B-

Radiohead OK Computer Bonus DVD / A-

Radiohead The Bends Bonus DVD / A

Long Step Mantis / C+

Tomb Raiders / F

Broken Saints / A++

Lost Seasons 1-4 (Already on Season 5) / A++

Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life / A+

Twin Peaks series (both seasons + pilot) / B- to A-

Pi / A

Escape from New York / B+

Inland Empire / B

Growing Up / A ++

Soda Stereo Unplugged / A+

Abnormally attracted to sin bonus DVD / B

Videogames finished
11 / 20
55%

Pretty much the same as with the DVDs except I have to play through. I left 3 games without finishing last year so that’ll possibly help me boost my finish percentage.

Zakk and Wikki / A+

Metal Gear Solid Twin Snakes – Game Cube / A +

Metal Gear Solid 2 Sons of Liberty – PS2 / A +

Metal Gear Solid 3 Snake Eater – PS2 / A++

Kingdom Hearts / C+

Final Fantasy 1 / D

Jak and Daxter The Precursor Legacy / B+

Jak 2 / B-

Jak 3 / A+

Final Fantasy IV / A

Final Fantasy VI / A+

Currently on – Ratchet and Clank/MadWorld and Wii Sports Resort

Books read
90%

Loved reading all I’ve bought and definitely enjoyed mixing it up with kid novels, graphic novels, science fiction, horror, fantasy and even sex books. So if variety is the spice of life, call me a jalapeño.

1. 2nd book of The Bartimeus Trilogy – The Golem’s Eye / B+

2. 3rd book of the Bartimeus Trilogy – Ptolemy’s Gate / A+

3. The Wind in the Willows / A-

4. Fahrenheit 451 / A-

5. Angels and Demons / B+

6. Nightwatch / A-

7. Joker’s Asylum / A+

8. Hardy Boys / C -

9. Thus Spake Zarathustra / A+ yeah I’m weird like that. Going from a graphic novel, to Hardy Boys, to Nietzche. This book is brilliant by the way.

10. Ignore Everybody – and 39 other tips to creativity / A

11. Animal Farm A+

12. Joker / A+

13. Quintuples / A-

14. Outlaw Nation / A -

15. HP Lovecraft – Blood Curling Tales of horror and the Macabre / A

16. Coraline / A

17. Noir / B +

18. Where the Wild things Are / B+

Playing guitar

Lucky for me I have a nephew that loves for me to play guitar. Every time he comes over I get to jam and it’s good to keep the skills up to date.


ACQUISITIVE:


Get new computer

Didn’t buy one but fixed the old one. Now for 2011, I’m going to probably need a new comp though.


Net connection

Hallelujah I finally came out of the dark ages. Long live DSL.

Digital recorder

Don’t even know what the hell I’m going to do with this one, but hopefully I’ll figure something out.

Digital Camera

Bless my wonderful mother for being gracious enough to get me a cam for Christmas.


MONETARY


Save Money

Didn’t bat 0 but could have been much better me thinks.

Payments
Similar to above. Not deficient but not proficient either. Would love to always have a payment ahead in my bills just to give me a cushion and boost my credit score and whatnot.

Mom’s cakes
Is this a moot point, it feels like it is.

Donations
$300+ not bad for being broke.


KNOWLEDGE:

Learn / record songs
Didn’t do ANY of this. Shame on me.


Learn Random Info
Every single day I try to look up for random stuff, be it news, science or whatever. I simply think there is just no excuse to not try and learn every day.

Read the news
Been doing that and can’t say how interesting it is to be able to comment on what people are talking about.


Retake French
Didn’t do this and seems like a 2011 goal to me.


Dance classes
Need to look for this info before January is over.

WRITING:


WAS posts
189 / 200 (as of august 30th)
94.5%

Not bad at all but lack of comments really makes it difficult to keep writing. Sure this blog never gets comments, but I’m clear on that. On the other blog, I can’t say I don’t miss them.


Posts in other blogs
36 +10 / 100
46%
Various factors worked into me not being that active with the other blogs. This year will be different.

Finish book
I have taken my time, but I seriously need to finish this thing to begin the mammoth task of transcribing it.


Write short stories
1 / 10
10%

Finishing that one story was by far one of the most satisfying things I’ve ever done. Rest assured, more of this is on the way.

Essay project
0 / 20
0%
Just didn’t feel the urge to do this. Maybe 2010 will be different?


Draft story arcs
0 / 3
0%*
I’ve written down tons of ideas for the books, but haven’t penned down a true story arc.

Movie Script
Non existent, comatose, pick your phrase or word. I didn’t even look at this doc the whole of 2009.

Progress reports
6/ 12
50%

12 reports is just WAY TOO MUCH. For the new year, I’m cutting down to 4 for every quarter. The new goals will be up soon though.

Standup piece
Another project I didn’t even look at for most if not all of 2009. Might try and bite the bullet and work on this though.


Be more positive
The year began with a slight hiccup but will do my best to do better than my hormones and be happy.


Forgive people
This was a liberating experience not because I felt free of a burden but because I had one less crappy topic to talk about, and it felt good.


Negative energy
Always doing my best to channel the anger. Will continue doing so.


Loving my fiancée
Only thing I can’t seem to stop getting better at. What can I say? I love the girl.


RECAP:

To sum up 2009, it was the first year I really put effort into making resolutions and trying to stick to them. I learned what was possible and what I REALLY need to focus on and I found out just how hard it is to get back on track once you stray. So here’s to 2010 and a better overall performance from yours truly. If I had to grade myself, I’d say C+ and I really want to graduate with honors in the school of life, so wish me luck and all the best.

Greatest gifts ever

When you think about the greatest gifts you’ve ever gotten for Christmas, odds are you think about that bike you got when you were a kid, or the train set you swore you’d never get, maybe your first Nintendo system or lord knows what GI Joe base you always drooled over in toy catalogues. That same euphoria you had as a kid is somewhere deep inside you and you just need to get the right gifts to evoke the right reactions. Maybe you wanted your wife to dress as Mrs. Clause and that gets you going. Maybe you wanted a new car. Maybe you wanted that iPod people so rave about, even if you insist on listening to eight tracks and vinyl. Maybe you even wanted that fat bonus from your job.

For me, this Christmas has brought me two of the best presents ever, apart from a supporting cast that remind me just how lucky I am in this life. This last week, I had one of my two best friends over for part of the weekend and the last times he’s been here, we’ve made a point of going to surf as much as his stay allows. That means waking up at 7 no matter what, and going for a surf. This past week we went surfing twice. Both times the conditions were excellent and the second time I was quite mellow and relaxed. That’s because the day before, I’d ridden two of the best waves in my home spot and he got to see both of the waves on first row.

There’s something about getting a great wave that is exhilarating. Having people you know and surf with see your wave makes it all that much better. For one of the waves, I was being asked if I was going and my answer consisted of a simple hell yeah. When I dropped a weird warpy ledge, the whole wave threw over me and a dry five foot barrel let me traverse it for about 4 seconds. I passed about three sections and thought I wasn’t going to make it more than once, but Father Christmas proved me wrong and let me out of the slab with a gentle hiss of barrel. A while later, another wave came by with my name on it and yet again I was asked whether I was going or not. My reply was I’M GOING and a few seconds later I launched into one of the biggest air rolls I’ve ever thrown at my home spot, and that’s saying something. Once again I had the joy of having had good friends seeing me launch into oblivion and land the move and when I think about it, Christmas Day just couldn’t get any better for me, but thanks to friends and family it did.

Here’s hoping Santa was just as jolly with you.

Cheers.

Fountain of Weird: Iron Beer

Who owuld have thought such an interesting carbonated brew would come from Cuba. As far as weird sodas go, I can't go to Miami and not have an Iron Beer. Simply can't and it's a rule of thumb, index, ring, middle or pinky finger. One of my favorite sodas is just not as accesible as you'd like it to be mainly because it's from Cuba and if you haven't noticed, the US and that beautiful island can't seem to get along too well. Actually, the company is based off Miami but it doesn't have a massive distribution scheme and apart from southern Florida, I have no idea where you can get your hands on it.

Political agendas and socio cultural conflicts aside, this soda is an original in every sense of the word because its taste seems like some strange combination of flavors. Almost as if you'd taken three sodas and mixed it all in one peculiar drink. Some people say it's a fruitier Dr. Pepper and that's not a bad assessment, but if you ask me, it's a mix of Kola Champagne (a Puerto Rican sugar bomb guaranteed to make your jaw hurt from the sugar rush), Orange Fanta and maybe a dash and a half of some strong lemon soda.

Carbonation is top notch and you'll definitely get your burp on. For me, it is best drunk straight from the can and super cold temps so as to avoid the use of ice that might water down the peppy drink.

So next time you're at Miami International, be sure to swing by La Carreta restaurant or ask someone who looks hispanic, where you can find an Iron Beer and bottoms up.

cheers

Tiempo de Parapapapapa

Si algo caracteriza a Puerto Rico durante las Navidades son tres cosas. Las mejores fiestas de Navidad en el mundo, la gente más ruda en la carretera en todo el año y la abundancia lluvia de plomo que hemos tenido como plaga navideña más de lo que quisiéramos.

Por suerte se ha creado una consciencia social o al menos el aguaje de una y por al menos dos o tres años se han reducido los tiros que se lanzan al aire y las lesiones y muertes que vienen con esto. Pero como anda la ignorancia, la intolerancia y la enfermedad mental este año, veremos si se continuamos la buena racha de no llevar los tiros al aire o si terminaremos un año no tan bueno con noticias para continuar poblando los titulares de nuestros periódicos.

En serios, como andan las cosas últimamentes no me sorprende que cada día tengo menos y menos ganas de salir a janguear. Ir a cena a San Juan te puede ganar el que te utilicen de escudo humano contra una balacera, estudiar en Toa Baja te puede ganar el que seas el jamón del sandwich en una guerra de pandillas y trabajar en un banco te puede garantizar el que te pongan una pistola a la cara y ni puedan conseguir a los que robaron.

Perdonen el cinismo y la carencia de espíritu navideño pero nada más de poner las decoraciones de Navidad en Walgreen's y la gente pega a guiar como más becerros de lo que son y a perder cualquier pisca de urbanidad que nos quedaba como un colectivo metropolitano.

De seguro tenía que haber algún momento en donde mirar al cielo para admirar la estrella de Belén era costumbre. Cómo llegamos de eso a no poder estar en la calle porque algún imbécil se creía guerrillero y haló al gatillo en una dirección lo más lejos de él posible, no lo sé. Pero ahí le vamos.

Injured in perfection

So no one likes to get sick, or get injured. That's more than natural because we should all be trying to be enjoying ourselves creating memories that will compensate for the endless hours we invest in our respective dayjob torture. Being a surfer has its definite pluses but also has its drawbacks.

On the positive side, surfing is liberating, fun, exercise, good for your health, great for the soul and something I plan on doing as long as I am able to. The negative side is that it depends on weather conditions often times and getting the right tide, the right swell, the right wind direction and the right rhythm for your surfing is not exactly easy. Which makes getting injued when it's epic that much more painful.

Last Sunday I was at the beach, the conditions were blissful to put it lightly and I'm bummed at myself for not having gotten up sooner (who knows if I would have been able to avoid the injury). But I was going to make the most of it. First wave, a bit tentative and got barreled..... on a tentative wave... so you can imagine the smile, the satisfaction and the idea that I was going to get my fix and then some... then something happened... call it silly, odd, stupid, unfair, illogical or just plain bad luck but when I was going back out, look towards my right while paddling and there went my neck... a spasm as I'd never felt before because it wasn't massive but it definitely felt wrong and I thought it would pass..... which it hasn't, and it's been more than 24 hours since the event.

I insisted on staying out and took five more waves which probably aggravated the injury but I didn't care because I was about to cry. Even with a bum neck, I got two more barrels an air and a roll.... that last one really sucked for my neck.

As I sit here, writing against what's probably best for me because I'm too desperate to continue laying in bed, I ask myself if this is just the first of a series of injuries and physical setbacks, because I'm not old, but I'm not getting younger.

I also realize that not being at work really doesn't bother me that much and I totally understand that I'm just there to earn a living even if it's the first job I actually enjoy. But the thing that bugs me is that I didn't get hurt when surf sucked, when I was shopping, when I was working or any other situation where it would have hurt less... no, I got hurt when it was epic and the conditions I've been begging for months upon months. I get to realize that it's not fate, or life, or anything working against me, it's just something that happened but like most humanity, I need to attribute some extra meaning to the event simply because of the circumstances and because you at least want an answer of why something like that has to happen, even if it's a little blip in the grand scheme of life.

And I guess it just helps me put things in perspective. Why should I get hung up on one moment, if my entire life is but a blip that I really should make the most of.

Just something to think about.

Cheers

Fountain of Weird: Manhattan Special

Take espresso, soda and a truckload of sugar, mix it up, bottle it and that's Manhattan Special Espresso soda. As far as weird sodas go, the unique thing about Manhattan Special is that it TRULY tastes like freshly brewed espresso coffee expressed in a chilled soda expression. Is this a good thing? Well depends on how much you like coffee and on how high your palette's sugar threshold is. Mine is pretty ridiculously high and I struggled to finish the bottle because I swear it was so sweet that I felt the underpart of my tongue trembling and my jaw clenching.

So interesting, very, but delicious? Well to me it was a very interesting tasting experience, but I don't see myself buying a six pack soon. Maybe in a few years I'll be working long nights and need something to keep me up that isn't illegal and at that moment, I think I'll have another, but for now, show me the next bottle.

Cheers

Fountain of weird: Moxie Soda

I'm somewaht of a soda freak and any chance I get, I try any different soda I come across. The only thing that limits me is pretty much availability and I've known to finish a soda I don't like just for the sake of saying I gave it a bottle's worth of a shot.

Enter a few random sodas I've had and I decided to give my take on them, starting with the oldest of em all, Moxie Soda.

Since 1884, this cold syrup meets jäger delicatessen has been sold to soda lovers near and far and though it's no Coca Cola, well for lack of a better word, it has Moxie. By this I mean that this soda is not for middle ground people looking for something most people will enjoy. You either enjoy it and find it interesting or would rather use it to clean your toilet or driveway. Its flavor reminds me to the cola flavored Bottle Cap candy and I really enjoyed it. If you need another reason to enjoy it, then just look at the logo and product design. It's so oldschool that you can't help but go with the flow of the vintage brew.

So if you're looking for something that goes good with a bit of ice cream or after an especially hot afternoon and want it to have a kick, try and find this 19th century soda. It's not easy, but I honestly think it's worthwhile and then some.

Cheers

Pacquiao makes history

This will be the headline tomorrow in pretty much every newspaper in the Philippines. Manny Pacquiao, a little over an hour ago did the unthinkable, he won his 7th world title in his 7th weight division against one of the best in the business.

If anyone dismisses Manny's victory because of the beating Cotto took last year, please slap that person for trying to rain on the parade of one of the greatest boxers of all time. Regardless of what happens in the future, Manny Pacquiao has cemented himself in boxing history along the names of Louis, Frazier, Ali, Leonard, Duran, Haggler, Hearns, Armstrong and Robinson. He has given everything we need to see that he is the pound for pound best in boxing and #2 and beyond seems like it all comes after a huge dropoff.

I had thought Cotto was going to win via decision but unfortunately, greatness has other plans than to allow some boxing fan to predict an outcome. After a flash knockdown in the 3rd round, Manny gave Cotto the punch I knew could be a key to victory, a huge uppercut from which I don't think Cotto ever recovered. If you had any questions about Manny's speed and power at welterweight, consider yourself served.

Simply put, I have never seen a boxer like Manny Pacquiao and he's just showed that no matter what distractions he may find, when fight night comes around, there is nothing remotely there to suggest he can be phased or defeated. If losing the fight wasn't bad enough, it came via stoppage but to Cotto a nod of approval for his courage to insist on going out on his shield even though it was obvious he was going to lose.

To sum it up all: Manny was too fast, too powerful and just too good for the Puerto Rican icon. More on this later.

Cheers

Miguel Cotto vs Manny Pacquiao

Come November 14th, the boxing world is definitely going to have something to write about. Like it or not, this is probably the most important fight of the year because the results will help define, two careers, one weight division, future super fight matchups and the pound for pound rankings. Not bad for a night's work.

Miguel Cotto has been on pretty big stages the last few years, but nothing compares with the challenge and the event that awaits in midnovember. For Manny, it's just another mega fight. In the last four years, Manny has truly made the case that he's the best fighter in the world, facing the best opposition in his division and beyond. He has KO victories over Marco Antonio Barrera, Erik Morales, Ricky Hatton and Oscar De la Hoya, and his road to supremacy has a tough roadblock by the name of Miguel Cotto.

For his part, Miguel Cotto has had some of the toughest fights in any career his last couple of outings. He had a memorable win over Zab Judah, he got the nod in a decision over Joshua Clottey in a fight I think Clottey let go, he outboxed Shane Mosley in an excellent match, and let us not forget the dismantling at the hands and potential plaster of Antonio Margarito. While Manny's controversies have spawned from disputed decisions over Juan Manuel Marquez, Cotto's source of commentary comes from lackluster efforts against a mismatched Michael Jennings and that close fight with Clottey. He's gotten into trouble, he's cutting, but he's shown grit when he's had to. People raise the end of the Margarito fight because Cotto did not go out on his shield, but honestly, that stoppage did more for Cotto's career than taking a further beating from someone who might have had plaster in his gloves or just a stronger will that night, unfortunately we will never know.

So those are the intangibles. In short, Manny is in a hot streak while Cotto seems to be struggling to keep warm. Add to this a new coach for Cotto after his estranged relationship with Evangelista Cotto and there's a lot in the air that makes you question his state of mind.

So what are the tangibles? Well here's a rough list:

1. Cotto is the heavier puncher. Manny is the faster puncher.
2. Cotto is a real welterweight. Manny has shown no signs of being less effective at higher weight classes.
3. Manny is faster. Cotto has better fundamental boxing skills.
4. Cotto is methodical. Manny is dynamic.
5. Both like to punch. None like to fight going backwards.
6. Both have great resolve. Both have taken punishment to win.
7. Both like to put on a show. Neither likes to win by decision.
8. Both are great finishers.

Lest you be fooled by the latest results, this is a close match and Manny will not knock Cotto out in the first few rounds as Freddy Roach has predicted. There are flaws in his defense, but if Manny isn't careful, Cotto will catch him off guard.

If you want a boxer comparison in the style of Deadliest match, lets compare various elements of the two boxers.

Height/reach:

Pacquiao - 5'6" / 67"
Cotto - 5'7" / 67"

The one inch height advantage should be a moot point because cotto never fights tall and he's not that long in height or reach. This means that physically, they're pretty evenly matched.

Weight:

Manny's last fight was at 140. Against Oscar De la Hoya he looked as big as Oscar so this means he can bulk up and not be affected. Again, even matchup in regards to weight though Cotto is obviously the naturally bigger man. But we really won't know how they size up against each other until we see them in the ring.

Stance:

Manny: Southpaw
Cotto: predominantly Orthodox but is extremely effective from the Southpaw stance.

Stamina:

Manny: Rarely shows signs of considerably fading and is a physical specimen.
Cotto: Has at times shown fatigue but can fight through it effectively.

Style:

Manny: Explosive. Fast. Has added various punches to his repertoire.
Cotto: Mechanical. Systematic. Patient. Solid amateur background.

So it's two aggresors squaring off. Last I checked, the people who have done best against Manny pick their spots and pounce when they see an opportunity. Ok so how do they measure in standard punches thrown by boxers.

Jab:

Manny has a lightning quick jab. It works as a range finder for the straight left or as a setup for the hook.

Cotto has an excellent jab and being left handed, he can actually stun you with the punch. Against Mosley, one of the deciding factors in the fight HAD to be the Cotto jab.

Advantage Cotto.

Left Hook:

Being a southpaw, Manny's power comes mainly from his left hand and Ricky Hatton was knocked out cold with a left hook that he didn't see. It was a kind of uppercut hook and it landed right on the jaw with full force. Pretty much a guaranteed knockout.

Cotto's money punches also come from his left but normally to the body, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have one mean left hook.

Seeing as this is Cotto's bread and butter, he gets the advantage.

Right Hook

Manny has developed a magnificent right hook which he showcased beautifully against Ricky Hatton. Quite simply, Ricky didn't see a right hook that hit him perfectluy on the chin.

Cotto's right hooks are mainly if only exclusively to the body. It's good, but it isn't spectacular.

Advantage Manny.

Straight Cross

Manny's money punch. Like Vic Darchinyan a couple of divisions lower, Manny banks on his straight left hand. it's put away a who's who of hall of fame boxers and facing an orthodox boxer, there's no reason to belive it won't be a major factor in the fight.

Cotto has a good right hand as he showed especially against Ricardo Torres and is a weapon he will definitely need to make a case to beat Manny.

Advantage Manny by a mile.

Uppercut

I don't think I've seen Manny throw many uppercuts in his career which is a shame since Cotto is designed to be weak to an uppercut as seen in his fights against Margarito and Judah.

Cotto occassionally throws an uppercut and I also think he could benefit from including this punch for his fight. Especially from the right hand.

Advantage Cotto.

Body Punches

Manny mixes it up but he rarely commits to the body.

Cotto lives off body punching.

Advantage, Cotto by a mile.

Ok, so each boxer has his or her own repertoire of punches that could help them win... what are their keys to success? Following I'll offer five keys to success for each boxer.

For Manny:

1. Hook off the jab. Cotto was hurt in his fight against Demarcus Corley from a counter right hook and Manny can tag Cotto with this punch if Cotto drops his defense.

2. Either pick your spots or go all out. Being economical obviusly favors faster fighters (see Floyd Mayweather and Roy Jones) but Cotto does not like fighting going backwards and if Manny can push him back, he should be massively effective. For my part, I think he should be economical because he does not have the weight or height of Margarito to back Cotto at will.

3. Always circle to your left. Cotto is probably banking on banging to your body and it's there for him since you lead with your left side. Protect this or enjoy a painful knockout.

4. Double the jab before firing your straight left. The only combination I think Manny should abuse is this one. Varying between single and double jabbing before giving a straight left should throw Cotto off.

5. Look for the straight left and consider shooting the uppercut. Opposing stances are open to straight punches and Manny's left is superior to Cotto's right.


For Miguel Cotto:

1. I said use an uppercut, but I didn't say from where. If Miguel Cotto can land a right uppercut to the solar plexus of Pacquiao, he's going to be in the money and Manny will be on the canvas.

2. Pour the pressure on. You are the heavier man or at least should be, act your weight.

3. Vary the tempo of the jab. I'm not asking for Joe Calzaghe like jabbing, I'm saying tag with the jab until you find a good opening to commit to the punch.

4. Walk to your left and away from Manny's money punch. Manny has a good right hook, but it is not guaranteed to end a fight, unlike his left.

5. Buckle the body. Hooking with the left and right should be mandatory for Cotto if he wants to win and for great body punching, he has to be in close quarters, which doesn't benefit Manny's punching power. Step in and crack a rib or two.


So who do I think will win? Honestly, it's anyone's fight and it will come down to discipline, gameplan, adaptation, and resolve. Manny probably has a game plan but we haven't seen him adapt in case things aren't going to plan. Cotto is more than able to adapt and change styles and tactics. Manny has never come into a fight out of shape and if he does so this time, he will get knocked out. Simple as that. Cotto looks good and started training a full month before Pacquiao stepped into the gym. We'll see if this is a factor.

As for other factors, well let's take into account that Cotto cuts badly around the mouth and the eyes. Something tells me Manny should jab and hook to the left side of the face of Cotto and guess what, since it's a lefty vs a right, odds are heads will clash so don't be surprised if Cotto gets cut, I'm pretty much banking on it. There is tension in the Pacquiao camp and Cotto's camp looks relaxed though I've yet to hear something to suggest Joe Santiago is the exact trainer to get the best out of Cotto.

Now if you were betting on this fight, I'd pick Cotto for one simple reason... He's a 3 to 1 underdog and he DEFINITELY has the tools to win.

Regardless of who you bet on or root for, missing this fight is not an option.

Cheers

Open letter to Jermaine Taylor

Dear Mr. Taylor:

I begin this letter with Mr. Taylor out of respect, not because I think you're old and washed up. I state that as blatantly as possible because that's what most people seem to think and though your record could definitely make a case for this, I want to hold on to hope, because at one time, I really did think you were a hell of a fighter until you ran into Pavlik.

Oh there they go again, Pavlik this, Pavlik that. True, this might sound like a broken record, but since your losses to Pavlik, quite simply, you haven't been the same fighter. Is it mental, is it physical, is it spiritual? I really don't know but I am seeing a once prized fighter taking a ridiculous amount of punishment and I don't want to see him get hurt.

Wait, but didn't I say I wasn't writing you off? Well, I'm not. I'm just going to say that there is little or no reason to be fighting over your rightful weight division. Your fighting weight is 160 pounds and please let there be no doubt that THAT is your rightful weight. Regarding conditioning, and fading in fights, which unfortunately has happened, there are two options to this: working on your cardio, which definitely seems to not be working or going for broke early in a fight and gamble on a knockout. The first one as I said, hasn't worked and both Froch and Abraham scored very late stoppages. In both instances you were having trouble with their right hand punches and though you can't forget that a hook can knock you out, getting knocked out the same way twice, is something that shouldn't happen to any boxer that is as skilled as we've thought you are.

What used to be a crisp thudding jab has become a pecking range finder and the slingshot action we saw from your one two combination has been often times absent. Also, holding your hands low and making your opponent pay when they think they can tag you works for Roy Jones and Floyd Mayweather, but clearly, this isn't an option for you so either modify your defense or get ready to take another bad knockout in your next outting.

As it stands, you are still in the Super Six Tournament and you will be facing people who will want to cash in on three points for a knockout. I urge you, stand your ground and let them know you are a participant and not a sacrificial lamb, or seriouslys consider pulling out of the tournament in benefit of your health and your professional record.

Here's hoping for a selective memory that learns from mistakes and forgets knockout losses and that the Jermaine of old shows up for the next fight and lands 30% of his right hands and remembers to punish with his jab.

Cheers

Not So Super 6?

The Super 6 Super middleweight tournament has begun and early leaders aren't that surprising when you see the results.

The first bout of the tournament had Arthur Abraham facing Jermaine Taylor. Simply put, Jermaine Taylor, though clearly the best known participant of this tournament, was diving into deep waters and if he didn't know it, he found out, the hard way he's found out all too often lately. After dominating the first 5 rounds (which was expected), Arthur Abraham turned up the volume, dialed in his strategy and methodically picked apart the former world champion. If you've ever played a turn based RPG game, this fight at times definitely felt more like that than an actual contest. Abraham punched, went into a defensive posture, Jermaine attacked, finished his flurry, went into defensive posture, Abraham started the cycle again. This happened for most of the fight and it was frustrating if you wanted an all out slugfest or something where Jermaine would have showed a little more boxing savvy. But true to form, Abraham's defense was pretty tight though one dimensional. But seeing as how effective it was, you'd have to wonder just how many dimensions you need when one game plan works as well as it did. As the fight plodded on, the action came in spurts and Abraham let rounds be a lot closer than they had to be way too often. But from time to time, he gave a good hook or one of dozens of rights hands that simply couldn't miss for him and at a couple of times, Jermaine looked on shaky legs. Then, in the final round, when Jermaine was pretty much fighting to end the fight on his feet, Arthur Abraham had other ideas. After a flickering jab, Abraham showed why he's one of two fighters favored to win this fight by sledgehammering a right hand that sent Taylor to the canvas for the third time in his career.

By tournament rules, you get 0 points for a loss, 1 point for a draw, 2 points for a victory and an extra point if you score a knockout.

Second fight of the night had Carl Froch facing Andre Direll. Well in case you're a boxer and are looking for a place to showcase your dirty boxing, you should definitely go to England. Nothing against English boxers, but when I think about Kostya Tszyu being "dethroned" by Ricky Hatton, my memory differs from the glorious night English boxing fans remember and I have flashes of holding and hitting, head locks and rough tactics that would make Andrew Gollota proud. If you differ from this opinion, you clearly have the union jacket in your blood and will not listen to reason, because just in case, I never said Kostya won the fight, I'm just saying Ricky didn't fight clean. He obviously won the fight. Getting back to present day England,Carl the Cobra Froch did exactly what he had to do, bullied his way into the path of young Direll, tagged the young guy and took a victory that was close, but clearly his. What we can take from the fight though is that Direll hits back when he's hit but not hurt, and back pedals when he REALLY gets tagged. The kid clearly has skills and when he turned up the heat in the latter rounds, I found myself looking at a prospect that might have gotten the decision at some other locations. I still saw Froch winning, but Direll's handspeed was impressive and his power honestly surprised me, because it's not like Carl Froch can't take a punch. The lessons learned for Froch in case he meets another slick boxer, cut off the ring, throw the right with abandon, then fake the guy and throw a hook. Sounds easy, but it isn't. For Direll, all I can say is that I think he can bang with the likes of Froch and Ward, but should be careful with Abraham, Kessler and even Taylor.

So as the standings go, Abraham is in the lead with 3 points, Froch 2nd with 2 points and Taylor and Direll tied for 3rd with 0. Kessler will be fighting Ward next and for me, Kessler is the fighter I want to see the most. He looks like the super middleweight Klitschko if you ask me and I think he has the most crowd pleasing style of anyone in the tournament and my pick to face of Abraham in the final.

So was the first night of the Super 6 not so super? I think it scored a B overall but the most important thing to note is that this tournament might very well change the face of boxing. The best fighting the best in this division is an interesting prospect, but can you imagine a featherweight, lightweight or welterweight tournament? Think of the possibilities. The best fighting the best, no ducking allowed, who you draw is who you fight and who you fight is eventually going to be who the crowd wants to see fight. If that isn't what Floyd Mayweather needs to truly make a case for pound for pound supremacy, I don't know what is.

Carta abierta al Departamento de Hacienda

“A reclamar los intereses.”

Eso es lo que dice el artículo de El Nuevo Día en torno al millar de personas que entienden que se le deben unos chavitos debido a que recibieron cheques emitidos luego del 31 de julio por la misma cantidad que le indicaba su planilla… y para la mayoría no va a cambiar. Aunque la reputación de vagos y quedados es popular el describir a los puertorriqueños, por cuan cierta o falsa sea, la reacción de apatía en torno a los ingresos no se debe a falta de deseo por reclamar lo nuestro. Esto no es una lucha de estatus, una pelea por los derechos humanos ni el reclamo por la vida; es simplemente evidencia adicional que el gobierno de Puerto Rico y sus agencias utilizan los medios para su propio bien, manipulan información y suben esperanzas para apaciguar la ira de tener que esperar de sobra por el dinero que se nos debe.

Aún hoy 4 de septiembre se andan procesando planillas y por cuánto insistan que son sólo aquellas que tienen problemas matemáticos, no queda duda alguna de que hay varias personas que entregaron su planilla a tiempo y andan pillados porque como muchos, cometieron el error de contar con ese dinero. El problema de esta situación y la razón por la cual muchas personas no van a “reclamar lo suyo” es que los intereses que en algún momento fueron el 6% de la planilla, que para muchos pudiese sobrepasar los $100 (y en estos tiempos sí que vale el refrán redundante de “100 pesos son 100 pesos”), terminaron siendo un doceavo de esa cantidad ya que el 6% es lo que uno puede recibir si pasa un año. Para ponerlo más en arroz y habichuelas, lo que iba ser una ayudita terminó siendo una cantidad que no da ni para llenar la mitad del tanque de gasolina.

Es simplemente otro caso del asterisco. Si no leíste los legales, pues mala tuya. El problema es que se nos vendieron villas y castillos, se explicaron las cosas superficialmente y una vez más, anota el gobierno, porque por veinte trapos de pesos, muchas personas no van a salir a la calle a gastar su hora de almuerzo o pasar el mal rato de bregar con una agencia de gobierno, ya que por lo general, estas se nutren de energía y tiempo, consumiendo ambos y dejando sólo un bagazo de mal humor y el semblante pelado de un chinche. No son faltas de ganas, es decir que no vale la pena y dejar que el gobierno se embolsille nuestro dinero, porque de $20 en $20, se llegan a miles y millones, que en vez de emplearse para pagar las agencias del gobierno antes de que tengan que cerrar operaciones nuevamente por falta de capital para pagar nómina, primero se usarán para pagar la dieta de un senador goloso o a remodelar el próximo Capitoilet.

Pero pues, probablemente es que no entiendo el proceso, las cosas no son tan simples como uno se piensa y aún estamos sufriendo las consecuencias de gobiernos anteriores. En otras palabras, el mismo cuento de siempre y como buen puertorriqueños, responderemos con un “pues, que se va a hacer”.

Existential Rant #1

Morning commutes are truly the purgatory between freedom and salaried slavery. It is the time when your thoughts are truly your own and interruptions are limited to subway stops, lane changes or any particular activity related to your preferred method of transportation. Images and words simmer in your still loading mind and things become clearer while at the same time confusing. Mental chatter phases in and out and you realize so many things that you’ll forget in the coming minutes. Universal epiphanies abound but you have no way of recording it and it’s sobering in the sense that while prepping up to enter the routine, your mind revel s in the river of thought that soon will be honed into a stream. Thought after thought churns and you don’t care about opinions or hearsays or anything. You just are, the world is, the universe will be. Anything is possible and the only thing sacred is this revelatory moment where you grasp the aether, drink of life and acquiesce to the mores of the mundane.

Love becomes even more abstract but strangely tangible, as does happiness, dejectedness, frustration or despair. You realize your happy or not and you can kind of figure things out because you’re still half asleep and your defenses are down. It’s too hard to face yourself when you’ve had your morning coffee and your shot of adrenaline from the first phone call, email or job scheduled for the morning. It is your job to not look past any of these obstacles but to rummage in the unconscious that you’re so eager to leave behind so you can snuggle in the cozy repose of the familiar.

Before you are bombarded by adverts and messages, appreciate the lucid brutality of your unawakened self. Swill the sour taste out of your mind and disorganize your life to the point where you really grasp what matters in your life. Only in chaos can some things really become clear, and though frightening, it is liberating.

It’s ok to hate yourself a little, just don’t forget to also love yourself. The point being that you need to appreciate your virtues while willing yourself to remedy the things that bring you down a level in the evolutionary staircase. So take a step in the right direction, whatever that may be for you, and forget to think to truly come in contact with brilliance.